Your spouse had an affair, now what? (Part 1)
You wake up one morning and your spouse says, “I had an affair.” You may not have the foggiest idea what to say or do next. Well, here’s a little help for those who are going through this nightmare.
You’re likely to experience a wide range of emotions from shock, anger, and sadness, to guilt or shame.
You may feel embarrassed if the affair was in public, or got out to friends, family or those in your circle. You may feel deep betrayal, disbelief, intense anger and hurt that your spouse didn’t tell you about the affair. You may feel confused about how this happened to your family and wonder why he/she cheated on you. You also may feel afraid of what will happen next now that they’ve been having an affair, but don’t let fear paralyze you into inaction.
The best thing you can do for yourself, and your family is to learn as much as possible about what’s happened so far, what will happen now that it has ended.
If someone tells you about the affair, don’t be quick to judge or blame them. It can take courage for someone to admit infidelity.
Don’t instantly jump to interrogation, the details are not as necessary as you may think. An affair is one of the highest forms of betrayal, don’t get in your way of healing by seeking out intricate details. Instead, instead, focus on seeking information that may help you in understanding what happened and what it means for your future together as a couple.
If they want to talk more about their experience with an affair, then let them share this information at their own pace and in a way that feels comfortable for them. Be aware that they may not want to discuss details such as who the other person is, how long the affair has been going on, or how many times it occurred because these types of questions tend to make people feel defensive and/or upset. You need to focus on yourself at this time and start doing things to help yourself heal and rebuild.
If you or someone you know is dealing with an affair, we hope this article inspires you to get out and seek help. It is important to remember that your healing is the priority at this time and you are not alone. You should seek help as quickly as possible; there is no benefit to struggle through the betrayl and pain.
You can heal and be whole again, millions have done it and you can too. If you would like to get started on your healing journey now, start with our free, private, and personal breakthrough session. Book yours today